Category Archives: Fear

THE XEROIC RESPONSE TO FEAR

THE XEROIC RESPONSE TO FEAR
(A conversation between Xero Aticus
and the Psychedelic Toad.)
Lee Broom

 

PSYCHO: So tell me Abner, what is it that you fear the most?

XERO: Nada, zilch, double zilch.

PSYCHO: What rhymes with zilch?

XERO: You’re changing the subject.

PSYCHO: It’s my subject. It was I who asked you what you fear; it                                 was I who asked you what rhymes with zilch. The answer                           is filch, which I believe is a word for theft, which is what                               you are doing when you beat around the bush.; you’re                                 stealing your own identity…
So tell me; what are the four things you fear the most?

XERO: Why four?

PSYCHO:(Silence.)

XERO: Okay, okay.

PSYCHO: (Silence)

XERO: Four things?

PSYCHO: (Silence.)

XERO: Okay I’ve got it.

PSYCHO: Ribbet

XERO: Toads don’t say “ribbet”; that’s the language of frogs.

PSYCHO: So…

XERO:  The four things are…

PSYCHO: (Silence)

XERO: Baptists, Muslims, Republicans and Democrats.

PSYCHO: Libertarians?

XERO: Them too.

PSYCHO:  Librarians?

XERO: Not afraid of Librarians.

PSYCHO: Why is that, Abner?

XERO: It’s okay with them if I think.

PSYCHO: Aren’t you a Lutheran?

XERO: I am.

PSYCHO: Why’s that?

XERO: Martin Luther was a Librarian in his spare time.

PSYCHO: Really?

XERO: Really.

 

Curious Abner and The mysterious, Psychedelic Toad discuss Fear and spacedust

 

lafayette compound 008

 

Toad: So tell me Abner, what is it that you fear the most?

Abner: Nada, zilch, double zilch.

Toad: What rhymes with zilch?

Abner: You’re changing the subject.

Toad: It’s my subject. It was I who asked you what you fear; it was I who asked you what rhymes with zilch. The answer is filch, which I believe is a word for theft, which is what you are doing when you beat around the bush.; you’re stealing your own identity.

So tell me; what are the four things you fear the most?

Abner: Why four?

Toad: (Silence.)

Abner: Okay, okay.

Toad: (Silence)

Abner: Four things?

Toad: (Silence.)

Abner: Okay I’ve got it.

Toad: Ribbet

Abner: Toads don’t say “ribbet”; that’s the language of frogs.

Toad: So…

Abner:  The four things are…

Toad: (Silence)

Abner: Baptists, Muslims, Republicans and Democrats.

Toad:  Libertarians?

Abner: Them too.

Toad:  Librarians?

Abner: Not afraid of Librarians.

Toad: Why is that, Abner?

Abner: It’s okay with them if I think.

Toad: Aren’t you a Lutheran?

Abner: I am.

Toad: Why’s that?

Abner: Martin Luther was a Librarian in his spare time.

Toad: Really?

Abner: Really.

 

SAFETY FIRST

lee_broom

I spend way too much time talking about overcoming FEAR.

I suffer from the FEAR of never having enough.

What I am discovering is…

FEAR is a gift.

FEAR teaches us to search for SAFETY.

FEAR teaches us to BE STRONG, to BE RESILIENT, to be PERFECT.

FEAR motivates us to compete; as we play games we not only have fun but we acquire and hone the skills necessary for protecting those sources of SAFETY, our families, our institutions of learning, our jobs. It is in these places of SAFETY that we discover the FIRST (but often ignored) of life’s great gifts, The GIFT of LOVE.

And so…

FEAR teaches us COURAGE.

FEAR teaches us FAITH.

FEAR  teaches us to PROTECT each other.

LOVE on the other hand makes all this perfectionism unnecessary.

THE FIRST SCREAM

 

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The first scream is an involuntary response to the first gasp. It occurs at the same time as our first sensation of fear.

The scream is reinforced with cradled arms and Soft Cooing Mommy Words, which lend a hint that this dangerous world into which we have been thrust has an oasis of safety; ours for the price of a scream.

This is our first scientific experiment.

This is our first experience at asking for and receiving approval, a sensation which will in future decades become confused with Love.

And our experiments no matter how objective they are meant to be will forever be tainted with the search for safety, approval and Love.

Life will be difficult for the lazy, for the intolerable, for the unwashed. And every minute of every day will be either exceedingly long or insufferably short for the unlovable.

Perhaps we ask for help.

And in the language of Mommy Words we may even ask another unwashed, unlovable soul “May I lend a hand?”

And a Spark of The Spirit ignites the flame of LOVE.

THE CATS ARE MOURNING JACQUE: PART TWO

bathroom 1 014

If you read yesterdays report on the cat attack you may have come to a different conclusion than I with my sappy editorializing.

It was not a fat cat from a rougher neighbor hood coming to visit our own with the view that this was a Fat Cat grocery aisle.

In fact there was an invading  troop of snarling feral doggies easily recognizable as coyotes who entered our grounds at yesterday’s dawning and gobbled not one but three of these felines. the kitties were absent at dinner last evening but not for mourning; they were obviously afraid of becoming wild coyote  dog chow. I was told hat the violence occurred in front of my door at 5:55 AM. I rose to the sound of a tropical forest cd at 6:00 AM.

In three weeks I’ll be returning home to a neighborhood where the wildest of the local  inhabitants are Gambel’s Quail and peafowl.

Home again, home again, jiggetty jog. 

THE FIRST SCREAM

 

385256_3715251858495_1762925520_n

The first scream is an involuntary response to the first gasp. It occurs at the same time as our first sensation of fear.

The scream is reinforced with cradled arms and Soft Cooing Mommy Words, which lend a hint that this dangerous world into which we have been thrust has an oasis of safety; ours for the price of a scream.

This is our first scientific experiment.

This is our first experience at asking for and receiving approval, a sensation which will in future decades become confused with Love.

And our experiments no matter how objective they are meant to be will forever be tainted with the search for safety, approval and Love.

Life will be difficult for the lazy, for the intolerable, for the unwashed. And every minute of every day will be either exceedingly long or insufferably short for the unlovable.

Perhaps we ask for help.

And in the language of Mommy Words we may even ask another unwashed, unlovable soul “May I lend a hand?”

And a Spark of The Spirit ignites the flame of LOVE.

Eye and Ego Surgery: Final exam.

lee_broom

“Blinded by the light, Cut loose like a deuce, another runner in the night…” Bruce Springsteen.

 

TO THE BOATLOAD OF FRIENDS AND FAMILY WHO HELPED ME THROUGH THE WORST PART OF A RECENT MINOR SURGERY, (MY IMAGINATION)

On April 2, 2013 Dr Neil Atodaria removed a cataract from my right eye. My fear was that with glaucoma, macular degeneration and several other scary things the names of which I don’t recall at the moment, would gather as the ghosts of Christmases Pasts and say “BOO”.

 

The surgeon’s upper torso would then automatically lurch into the scare-sneeze-orgasm pattern. impaling the helpless orb and complete at long last the final demise of this eyeball. In an attempt to prevent the disaster the doctor would reach out with his other hand and bump the hand of an equally motivated surgical assistant, spilling God knows what into the other eye rendering it into a gooey substance which would then ooze out on onto my left cheek.

 

In the final scene of panic I am listening to a motivational tape of Helen Keller while simultaneously tapping my feet to a dueling banjos kind of voice duet by Ray Charles and Little 12-year-old Stevie Wonder, singing Blinded by the Light. which of course would not have yet been written.

 

All my friends will surely guess that I, Lee Broom, having been restored to sanity many long years ago had but to endure the luxury of self-inflicted depravity for only a very few moments. It might have lasted longer but Morris called me and in his best Jack Benny impression, shouted at me over the phone, “Now, cut that out.”

 

But seriously, I can see better than I could when I was four years old when I thought that it was normal to see two moons in the sky at night.

 

Yesterday afternoon I went for my final checkup. The crippled eye is still crippled but with new lens it has twenty – twenty vision. (SMILE FOR THE CAMERA, LEE BROOM).

 

Bobby Lee Gettings Oakes Broom.