Tag Archives: choices

THE LINE

THE LINE

It was a lovely spring day. The sun was warm, the birds were singing, and the wispy clouds added a touch of pastel pleasantness to the day.

Sleepy-eyed Abner rose early that morning perplexed as usual (the man had many questions) having just awakened with a REM time voice in his head, demanding, “Go stand in line”.

“Who said that?” inquired Curious Abner.

“Go stand in line.”

Befuddled Abner rose from his state of confused repose, made his bed and his breakfast as the memory of the command “Go stand in line” echoed in his head.

After a bowl of oatmeal with walnuts, berries and a touch of honey, Abner said to his  sleepy self “What a lovely spring day. The sun is warm, the birds are singing, and the wispy clouds add a touch of pastel pleasantness to the day. I’m gonna go lfind that line and stand in it.”

And he did; he went for a walk, that is.

Inquisitive Abner looked everywhere for the line.

“Where is it?” Abner inquired.

“Excuse me” said Ab to the first person he met. “Do you know where the line starts?

“I believe it starts right here” replied the stranger.

“Thank you” said Abner and the stranger went on her way.

Obedient Abner stood in line.

Eventually, Abner began to fidget. Standing in line apparently was not a great way to spend a lovely spring day.

Impatient and needing to do something, anything at all, Abner decided to return to his lovely spring day walk and he did.

Where is that line?

Eventually however, another stranger came along.

“Excuse me” inquired Abner. “Do you know where the line starts?”

“I believe it starts right here” replied the stranger.

“Thank you” said Ab and the stranger went on his way.

And once again, Compliant Abner stood in line.

And as before, Ab  observed  that standing in line apparently was not a great way to spend a lovely spring day…

But Stubborn Abner stood his ground.

Standing there Abner wondered to himself, “If this is the line where are  the people?”

Time went on. Ab began to fidget.

Eventually however, another stranger approached.

“Excuse me” asked Abner. “Do you know where the line starts?”

“I believe it starts right here,” came the reply.

“Would you like to stand in line?’ asked Sorta Social Abner.

“Thank you for asking” replied the stranger; “But this line is much too long” ; “have a nice day”.

Surprised at the stranger’s remark, Curious Abner turned around. Behind him was a line of people that seemed to wend its way into Eternity. All were waiting patiently, no one was talking to anyone.

Addressing the person now before him Abner introduced himself; “Hi my name is Abner; what’s your name?”

“My name is Rose” she replied and began to introduce him to several other people behind her. There was Xero Aticus,and his sister Gardenia and their centenarian grandmother,  Albinisia Mary.

Albinisia Mary had more stories in her lovely old head than Abner had questions. (And as we know, Curious Abner was after all, a man with many questions).

Within minutes this part of the line was starting to look more like a party, everyone utilizing the conversational opportunities now being made available to them.

As the line evaporated into groups of animated conversationalists, everyone involved gradually migrated to a nearby park.

By the end of this lovely spring day, the sun still warm, the birds no longer singing and the once wispy clouds having surrendered their touch of pastel pleasantness to the gathering cloak of darkness, Weary Abner decided to return home…

And he did.

As Sleepy Abner crawled between   crisp, clean sheets he thought about the day now departing and smiled.

The next morning Optimistic Abner crawled out of bed, ate a bowl of oatmeal with walnuts, berries and a touch of  honey and went out to greet another lovely spring day; the sun was warm, the birds were singing and the clouds though wispy, added a touch of pastel pleasantness to the day.

Curious Abner (the man with many questions who now had some answers) thought to himself “I think I shall go stand in line.”

And he did.

NO ONE KNOWS THE FUTURE – EVERYONE CREATES IT

I believe in evidence. I believe in observation, measurement, and reasoning, confirmed by independent observers. I’ll believe anything, no matter how wild and ridiculous, if there is evidence for it. The wilder and more ridiculous something is, however, the firmer and more solid the evidence will have to be.
—Isaac Asimov[1]

 

No one knows the future; everyone creates it.

Every action begins with an idea.

Every idea, when repeated grows stronger.

Affirmations really do come true.

Affirmations become reality whether spoken alone or as a group.

Affirming the destruction  of Planet Earth is a popular idea.

HOWEVER…

Popularity is not a good reason for choosing Fear.

We must love the vengeful insiders.

The salvation of us all will  come not from doing battle but by experiencing Love.

Smile; our only hope is to Accept the Gift of Love and to Pass it on.

Revenge and punishment are the smug expression of weak egos and bad dreams.

This is the Sermon of the Bully Pulpit.

The angry parent who spanks their child while stating “I’m doing this for your own good” is a liar.

Ignore the Fear.

Accept the Love.

Pass It On.

Please.

AND THERE YOU HAVE IT

And There You Have It.

Voice of  Dissension: I an Atheist.

Voice of Inquisition:  Do you believe in LOVE?

Voice of Dissension: Certainly, I love my family.

Voice of Inquisition:  Do you believe that LOVE is Unconditional?

Voice of Dissension:  Absolutely.

Voice of Inquisition:  Would you agree that every living thing has a reason for everything it does?

Voice of Dissension:  Hmm.

 

TWO VERY ILLOGICAL REMARKS and one kinda-sorta.

Atheist: The lack of Evidence is evidence. Ergo God does not exist.

Believers: There must be a God.

Agnostic: Only the Agnostic can discover God (if God exists).

 

HAIRCUTS AND DIETS: THE THEORY OF LOSING BY WINNING

lee_broom
LEE BROOM 

 

HAIRCUTS AND DIETS: THE THEORY OF LOSING BY WINNING

 
HAIRCUTS

Barber: how much do you want me to take off?

Barbee: Just leave 1 ½ inches all over.

Barber: Okay but how much do you want to cut off?

Barbee: How long is it now?

Barber: (measures hair.) 4 inches here and 3 inches over here and 1 ½ over here, around the ears.

Barbee: Okay so remove 2 ½ inches here, 1 ½ inches over here and don’t cut around the ears.

Barber: That’s too difficult, how long do you want it to be?

Barbee:  Just leave 1 ½ inches all over.

Barber: That’s better; you shoulda said so in the beginning.


DIETS

Dieter: I weigh 200 lbs. I am 5’10” and I want to get to down to 160 lbs.

Nutritionist: You are consuming 2000 calories daily. I want you to start eating 1500 calories daily.

Dieter: At 3500 calories a pound it’ll take me 40 weeks to lose the fat.

Nutritionist: Actually, if all you do is diet, much of the weight loss will be muscle.

Dieter: I want to lose weight and I want to do it in half the time. And I don’t want to lose any muscle.

Nutritionist: Great, so let’s add a five-mile jog every morning; that should do it.

Dieter: This is getting too hard. I can’t do what you ask.

Nutritionist: Have you ever successfully reached your desired weight and kept it off for more than a month?

Dieter: No.

Nutritionist:  Okay, I have a better method. Do the 1500 calorie diet and jog for fifteen minutes, four times a week. How does that sound?

Dieter: Great. How long is this for?

Nutritionist: The rest of your life. The 1500 calories is what you should have been eating all along for someone your height and level of activity. You’ve been trying to win by losing. Commit for life and you will become successful.  By the way, I can recommend a really great barber. You have very long hair, you could lose a pound with a good haircut; Just tell him to cut everything down to 1 ½ inches.